022011 -- 7:30 PM
Feb. 20th, 2011 07:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
memorialrainbowI've considered myself to be in a constant state of morning lately.
No matter what I do, no matter where I go, it's morning. When I wake up at two in the afternoon, it's morning to me, so I say 'good morning' to people. I go on saying good morning up until it's night for me...and then it's midnight, and it's morning for everybody else! There is no more day. There is only morning.
I also oftentimes consider myself to be in a state of 'mourning.' Perhaps I'm too hard on myself, but I want to be able to reach higher and higher. I think that's something a lot of people in my generation can identify with. Wanting to do our best, no matter our reasons for doing so. And yet, I think we hold ourselves back.
It kind of reminds me of the people in Egypt and the other Middle Eastern countries (forgive my geography, I do read Time, but I'm not perfect). If they can rise up, so can we. But I'm not asking for a rebellion of our government. I think it's time for a revolution of the way we think. When I started thinking in terms of absolutes, realizing that I only have this one life, I realized how much I want to do with it. How precious it is. How it's not important to die, and how it is important to die at the right time, only after we have done everything we have wanted to do. It's like a good day at Cedar Point. You gotta fit all your stuff in while you're here, and only then can you peacefully sleep. I don't know, maybe ghosts with unfinished business do exist somewhere in this world. But I don't want to be one of them. I want to go when it is my time, and that is why I'm not scared anymore. Threats of darkness no longer scare me the way they once did. Once you see past the illusion, that's all it is -- an illusion.
What do you do with the illusion once it is broken? You can either reteach it to your children, or not have any children at all. Maybe that's not entirely true. You either believe in it, or make your own path.
"You can't break me, because I'm already broken/Aren't we all?"
No matter what I do, no matter where I go, it's morning. When I wake up at two in the afternoon, it's morning to me, so I say 'good morning' to people. I go on saying good morning up until it's night for me...and then it's midnight, and it's morning for everybody else! There is no more day. There is only morning.
I also oftentimes consider myself to be in a state of 'mourning.' Perhaps I'm too hard on myself, but I want to be able to reach higher and higher. I think that's something a lot of people in my generation can identify with. Wanting to do our best, no matter our reasons for doing so. And yet, I think we hold ourselves back.
It kind of reminds me of the people in Egypt and the other Middle Eastern countries (forgive my geography, I do read Time, but I'm not perfect). If they can rise up, so can we. But I'm not asking for a rebellion of our government. I think it's time for a revolution of the way we think. When I started thinking in terms of absolutes, realizing that I only have this one life, I realized how much I want to do with it. How precious it is. How it's not important to die, and how it is important to die at the right time, only after we have done everything we have wanted to do. It's like a good day at Cedar Point. You gotta fit all your stuff in while you're here, and only then can you peacefully sleep. I don't know, maybe ghosts with unfinished business do exist somewhere in this world. But I don't want to be one of them. I want to go when it is my time, and that is why I'm not scared anymore. Threats of darkness no longer scare me the way they once did. Once you see past the illusion, that's all it is -- an illusion.
What do you do with the illusion once it is broken? You can either reteach it to your children, or not have any children at all. Maybe that's not entirely true. You either believe in it, or make your own path.
"You can't break me, because I'm already broken/Aren't we all?"
