121311 -- Are You There?

[memorialrainbow]

I don't want to lose this love or give it, give it up
In the winter, my heart sways in the hot wind
Even now, I still don't believe the words.
But they remain stuck in my mind

We can't meet; I wonder where my feelings are
I want to see you, but I'm having trouble finding my phone
Even though I wish the distance between us would close soon
What could I possibly send to you, unpredictable boy?

I think of writing a haiku; I want to find where your heart is
One, two, three -- slowly, the final train goes by
"Ah, I've got some free time now" -- is this my chance to see you?
Pushing the buttons little by little
I close my eyes and pray for a reply as I send my feelings to you.

"Hey, hey, what are you up to now?"
"I thought I'd go to sleep soon."
But I don't want to sleep at all.
This is our conflict in the empty dead of night.
I suppose it's a natural high: is today already a good night?
He's such a selfish person, but he's the one I love
Good night -- good morning? -- this season isn't over yet.

I don't want his attention to be taken away from me,
for it to be given up.
In this season when the hot air rises from the subway,
I wipe away my tears.
Even now, I still don't believe
the words that are stuck in my head.