memorialrainbow | 121511 -- Vicious Cycle

I dream, I wake up, I go through my day, I dream, I wake up. This is my life these days.
I dreamed that I was on stage, behind the Korg, as you stood in front playing your guitar and singing out loud. I hit every note the way I needed to, in perfect unison, with the crowd cheering and praising until the power went out and when I opened my eyes, you weren't there.
I dreamed that you brought pizza into the radio station and almost dropped it when you saw me. We talked for hours, catching up, talking about old times and trading stories. But when I opened my eyes, my boss was standing outside the van, cell phone in hands and a blank look on his face.
I dreamed that we were dancing together, and you took my hand and whirled me around to the music. I dreamed that I took your last name, that we strung the red thread of fate around our fingers, and swore we would never be apart. Until you said you were sorry and I stared at the ceiling, praying for you to come back.
I dreamed that I was back on your couch, Diet Sunkist in hand, as we watched the movie. I closed my eyes and felt the sugar high and you led me through that night, and when I woke up, the can was gone and my mother was scolding me for being a bad girl.
I dreamed that you were still talking to me again. I dreamed that you put your arm around me and kissed me like you used to, and I stole that hat off of your head and you let me keep it. I dreamed that you weren't critical of me, like you once used to be, and that you never, ever lied to me. I still wish you hadn't.
I dreamed of Tuesday mornings and late nights, of Christmas lights and penguins and trust that was broken, of a reality that wasn't a dream. I dreamed that, when we talked on the Eiffel Tower, that you changed your mind. I woke up and we both cried.
I dreamed that I stopped losing people. I dreamed that you came back and decided that you were going to love me, and me alone. I dreamed that I met you at the altar and we swore we would love each other forever. But that's just a dream. That could never happen.
I had another dream recently. I was riding the one train home from Washington Heights, and you texted me saying you were in Times Square. I wasn't sure how you had gotten all the way from the edge of the world to Times Square. All I knew was that I could catch an express train at 96th Street to get to you quicker. I woke up, and I wasn't even in New York City, but I could still feel your smile on my lips.
This time, when I'm awake, I will go to Times Square and become your knight in shining armor, because some dreams deserve to come true.

Those of you who read TTR might want to go there too.